Once upon a time somewhere deep in Germany’s Black Forest lived a notorious witch by the name of Alla von Achtung. Her name and her story most likely would have been lost in the shadows of history, had it not been fore the Holy Inquisition to take notice of her and accuse her of different activities connected to incubi, succubae and other cubicles.
So extraordinary her case was however that even extensive research in the annals of monasteries and even the secret archives of the High Seat of the Roman Inquisition itself never let to any conclusive results as to what actually were her activities and what finally let to her disappearance.
We, the members of AKIA, the anarchic Kratom Initiates Association, have not even been able to establish the exact period in which she lived or the exact location of her then locally famous Kratom Hut.
Indeed there are indications she might not have been a historical figure at all but rather a “compendium” of several cases and several persons that were so shocking for the Holy Inquisitors that it was finally decided not to proceed with the execution of formal protocols as it was usual with other cases of the Inquisition.
On the following pages we have tried to comprehend what little we have been able to find about her. How tempting these bits and pieces may sound to you, we, the members of AKIA, the Anarchic Kratom Initiates Association, cannot support any attempts to emulate Alla von Achtung’s activities nor would we ever promote Kratom for human consumption.